Alzheimer’s/dementia and finances
-
Long before diagnosis, there can be financial clues that something’s amiss.
I know this was true for my MIL. Unpaid bills, lost credit cards, falling for scams…
More to keep an eye on for our elders…or for us?
-
Yea, I witnessed this first hand, but after the fact with my great-aunt. We didn't see her on a regular basis and she didn't appear to be having cognitive issues. Long story short, she ended up in a memory unit and Mr wtg and I were tasked with clearing out her house after she moved out. We found her checkbook, register, and cancelled checks (remember those?) and you could see the cognitive decline. Towards the end the checks were written to "Electric Company" instead of ComEd. Fortunately she had a trust and a bank was acting as trustee to pay her bills, so she didn't get into any trouble. But it demonstrated to me how someone could still seem to be functioning, but who had serious cognitive issues.
The other one was my Mom. Over a couple of days she 1) reversed digits for the year on a check she was writing, 2) asked me for a ride to church which was most odd because she had a car and always drove herself everywhere, and 3) she called me on Sunday morning and said she wasn't going to church and by the way, she had to dial my number a half dozen times before she got it right. Off to the ER we went. The neurologist who examined her said it was very unlikely she had had a stroke. She ordered a CT scan and came into the room and said that my Mom had had a stroke, probably four or five days prior. Daughter > Neurologist without imaging technology.
We're starting to figure out how to set things up so we can turn over our finances as we age. Build the relationship now so we're comfortable handing things over. We have no kids, and over time, we've seen people we've named as successor trustees die young. Probably best to find a trust company/bank/someone that's a professional. More expensive, but much less hassle.
Would love to swap ideas with y'all.
-
Yea, I witnessed this first hand, but after the fact with my great-aunt. We didn't see her on a regular basis and she didn't appear to be having cognitive issues. Long story short, she ended up in a memory unit and Mr wtg and I were tasked with clearing out her house after she moved out. We found her checkbook, register, and cancelled checks (remember those?) and you could see the cognitive decline. Towards the end the checks were written to "Electric Company" instead of ComEd. Fortunately she had a trust and a bank was acting as trustee to pay her bills, so she didn't get into any trouble. But it demonstrated to me how someone could still seem to be functioning, but who had serious cognitive issues.
The other one was my Mom. Over a couple of days she 1) reversed digits for the year on a check she was writing, 2) asked me for a ride to church which was most odd because she had a car and always drove herself everywhere, and 3) she called me on Sunday morning and said she wasn't going to church and by the way, she had to dial my number a half dozen times before she got it right. Off to the ER we went. The neurologist who examined her said it was very unlikely she had had a stroke. She ordered a CT scan and came into the room and said that my Mom had had a stroke, probably four or five days prior. Daughter > Neurologist without imaging technology.
We're starting to figure out how to set things up so we can turn over our finances as we age. Build the relationship now so we're comfortable handing things over. We have no kids, and over time, we've seen people we've named as successor trustees die young. Probably best to find a trust company/bank/someone that's a professional. More expensive, but much less hassle.
Would love to swap ideas with y'all.
Yes, this issue is on my mind,. My mother just had her 80th birthday and she seems to be doing ok for now, but I pay close attention and notice little things, like word search trouble.
@wtg said in Alzheimer’s/dementia and finances:
Would love to swap ideas with y'all.
One thing, re bill paying, is that so many more things are or can be automated these days that it seems easier to avoid getting oneself into trouble.
Btw as you know, we also don't have any kids, so as we get older, we're going to have to figure out some support networks. We're a ways off from that, but it's closer than we realize probably.
-
The memory care place is about a 5 minute drive from their house, so visiting her is easy. It’s a small wing of an assisted living facility. They are locked in, it’s a hallway with individual rooms and linked common areas. There is a small outdoor balcony they can access, then a locked gate to a really nice outdoor terrace (second floor) for the assisted living folks that you can access if you are with her - flowers and views, and they sometimes have live music. Not sure any of these places are ideal, they are filled with people whose families can no longer care for them - people who can be really difficult to care for. Care taking jobs don’t pay that well. It can be pretty noisy depending on what is going on with the residents - some of them get really unhappy. My mom feels like the staff are too noisy (they are friendly and boisterous sometimes which annoys her) and wonders why they are in her house. These places are expensive, this one is at least $9k a month. (Mom bought long term care insurance, not sure how much). People who have a gazillion dollars can probably manage something that feels ideal. It’s pretty depressing for the rest of us.
-
The memory care place is about a 5 minute drive from their house, so visiting her is easy. It’s a small wing of an assisted living facility. They are locked in, it’s a hallway with individual rooms and linked common areas. There is a small outdoor balcony they can access, then a locked gate to a really nice outdoor terrace (second floor) for the assisted living folks that you can access if you are with her - flowers and views, and they sometimes have live music. Not sure any of these places are ideal, they are filled with people whose families can no longer care for them - people who can be really difficult to care for. Care taking jobs don’t pay that well. It can be pretty noisy depending on what is going on with the residents - some of them get really unhappy. My mom feels like the staff are too noisy (they are friendly and boisterous sometimes which annoys her) and wonders why they are in her house. These places are expensive, this one is at least $9k a month. (Mom bought long term care insurance, not sure how much). People who have a gazillion dollars can probably manage something that feels ideal. It’s pretty depressing for the rest of us.
Thanks for sharing that Jodi, it sounds sort of mixed but manageable.
@Jodi said in Alzheimer’s/dementia and finances:
Care taking jobs don’t pay that well.
Yep, this is one part of the problem. The cost to the residents/patients is another...
It’s pretty depressing for the rest of us.
I can only imagine. I'm sorry!
